Student - March 12, 2015


For ten minutes already Willem-Jan had been waiting outside an occupied bathroom. Finally, the door opened and, to his horror, he saw Vera’s boyfriend come out. As always he was decked out in a butt-ugly shower cap that kept his dreadlocks dry.

The story so far: For some time now Vera has been dating an alternative type of guy who lives at Droevendaal. They recently started getting it together and the rest of the household can’t help but notice.

‘Oh, I thought lianas needed water,’ said Willem- Jan, mumbling somewhat. He was never hostile to Robby, but today politeness seemed like too much to ask. Because everyone except Derk had been to the nocturnal animals party or the ball, they all gathered a while later at the dining table for a hung-over brunch. Bianca and Filippo, their faces puffy, drank cups of coffee in quick succession. Willem-Jan tried to ignore his throbbing head while spreading slices of bread. As if the hangover wasn’t bad enough, he was irritated beyond belief by the cooing couple.

‘Sweetie, you must give me that last bite,’ said Robby, still in his bathrobe, a thatch of chest hair visible. ‘Here pumpkin, this is for you,’ said Vera as she fed him a triangle of bread covered in chocolate sprinkles. Behind their backs, Bianca mimed retching, causing Willem-Jan to choke on his coffee. That Robby and Vera were inseparable was an understatement. In recent weeks it had seemed like they had gained an extra housemate.

Mortierstraat wall.jpg

‘Say, Robbert,’ said Willem-Jan, who without fail acted like he couldn’t remember the name of Vera’s boyfriend. ‘Have you made plans to occupy Forum? Given what’s happening in Amsterdam, you must be itching to do something.’ A serious expression settled on Robby’s face. ‘Well, of course I sympathize with the occupiers, but their dispute is about minority languages. It’s not really a Wageningen issue.’ Willem-Jan decided to leave it there, even though he usually enjoyed discussions like this. Too strong a headache. Fortunately, the love-birds were soon preoccupied with one another again.

‘By the way, Vera honey, are we going to my place tonight or staying here?’ Willem-Jan saw the faces across the table brighten with hope. ‘Meh,’ said Vera, ‘let’s stay here. It’s much more sociable.’ The faces fell. When the couple had left for Vera’s room, everyone exchanged glances. ‘I don’t know how much longer I can put up with this,’ said Bianca. ‘When they’re together they are unbearable.’ Derk shifted uncomfortably on his chair. ‘Er,’ he said, ‘Vera said yesterday that she’s never been so in love. She wants to be with him forever.’ They all sighed. ‘People,’ said Willem-Jan, pausing for dramatic effect. ‘We are the victims of the first Wageningen occupation.’